We all want to be happy but very few of us consistently are. The World Health Organization predicts that by 2020, depression will be second only to heart disease in terms of global illnesses. Our happiness, when it occurs, is usually the result of outside events, such as when someone is kind to us, or when some opportunity is presented to us. That state of mind is fleeting. Our goal should be to be happy no matter what happens to us.
People whose happiness is not dependent on what happens to them actually bring happiness to their experiences rather than trying to get it from them. They still have bad emotions but experience an underlying state of peace and well-being. They have a sense of lightness or buoyancy, feel love and compassion for themselves and others, feel passionate about their life and purpose, have a sense of flow and openness, feel alive, vital, and energetic, are at peace with life, and are fully present in the moment.
Unfortunately it takes conscious effort to become happy. Our minds are wired to be fearful. We are much more likely to notice and remember something that frightens us than something that brings us joy. This works well under very bad circumstances, but with the constant barrage of stresses seen in modern times, most people's dominant way of thinking has become one of being on guard for trouble. In addition, our egos, which are just a collection of beliefs about who you are based on your past experiences, are always afraid of death. Being consistently happy doesn't come easily. Like most worthwhile things, it requires a lot of effort in order to achieve it.
It turns out that you have a happiness set point that works like a thermostat. Whenever the temperature in your room gets more than a certain amount outside the temperature you set on your thermometer, the thermometer tells it to return to that set temperature. In the same way, no matter what happens to you in your life, you return to your pre-set level of happiness. You can change that pre-set level however, if you make a deliberate effort to change it. It turns out that although 50% of your pre-set happiness level is probably determined by genetics, and 10% is determined by our current circumstances, the other 40% is determined by your habitual thoughts, feelings, words, and actions. Those things you certainly can change.
You can't just decide to be consistently happy. The best way to achieve that is to practice the habits of happy people. You need to become aware of which habits support happiness in your life and which ones don't. (Two of the worst habits are having the beliefs that you will be happy when... and you will be happy when you have more money or success). Then you can gradually eliminate those bad habits and cultivate the good habits. When you've done that, you can reach the state of consistent happiness you've always wanted.
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